Dentists, Electrons and Kings

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Hi,Friend, I had asked Southwick to send out yesterday’s story, I hope it got through to you: it had the wrong return address.  Xin Loi Bah.  I had to go across town to the Dental School:  I get to help a student learn his craft.  My tooth might get a diamond inlay.  More likely my tooth gets a root canal.

Dentistshave the goal of giving you a functional set of teeth –Dentation.  They have a maximum standard: Can the patient chew?  End of treatment.  Done deal.  Anything extra is way outside of standard treatment: including cyanide or diamond inlays for spies and gangstas.  Cosmetic dentistry, not basic research, is where the money is.


But that essentially means that the Dental Profession is stuck.  They do not have to improve.  They get their job done.  And that’s the Portland attitude: Git ‘er done.  A dentist will learn to glad hand the patient, drill ‘em, fill ‘em, and bill ‘em to give ‘em the thrill’em.  That is the craft, and a Dentist from 1920 would have no difficulty in the modern dentists office.  I have asked dentists repeatedly about that fact, and they agree, that in large measure, the field is stagnant.  Dental research may exist, but…   why?


The appointment took three hours, and my tooth is awaiting final judgement on root-canal or crown or diamond inlay.  The good news is that I can have salad dressing without having crazy twitches for hours afterward.  The aerial tram ride back was fabulous with Mount Hood in the distance, but the trains ran late, and I missed my usual appointment to gather stories at theOpen Range Street Person Preservein St John’s.

So,Friend, I stopped by 3 Gunas Lp to share a beer with Southwick and Tommy: Roger was still out at his lady’s house on the coast.  

Southwick mentions physics, Tommy says he knows all about it: 

"It’s hydrogen. Think of the electron as the woman who plays hard to get.  The man in the center is stuck.  That’s hydrogen, Southwick!  That’s Hydrogen.  You know hydrogen!   Well, that’s how it works! 

Tommy’s voice explodes each phrase as if the force of his words makes it a matter of personal experience.

"And when you got two or more protons you need newtrons.  You need some easy women in there or else they are faggots.  Just think of the orgy that Uranium has got going in the new Klus thing.  And I got the hot tub in the center."

Southwick barely registers shock, and shoots back: "That’s nucleus, Tommy, but even though you are a card carrying member of the "Church of Who Gives a Fuck," (which lets you use the word ‘faggot’ to mean something else than a bundle of sticks.) pointing out women to be ‘easy’ or ‘hard to get’ makes a good analogy for nuclear physics is stretching a bit don’t you think?  The women you know are the womenyouconsider whores.   To me, they are something quite else, and I don’t get any sexual images from the nucleus:  Or I didn’t up tonow, thank you very much!"

But Tommy wasn’t paying much attention, he had gone back to tearing the wings off of old Ferrari’s. 

(close scene, queue Al)

Hi, This is Al.  Southwick, ha, he walked right into that one.  He’s going to be looking for electrons now!


Friend, I work at the docks.  I read St John’s Jims emails every day.  Just to proove that you don’t need to be no literaty types to have a laff at Southwick.  Tommy tells me where to laugh, sometimes.   He’s usually wrong, but we laugh where he says anyways.  So tell your friends to subscribe.  Ya don’t want your sewer to back up, do ya?

(queue Jim)

Jim here again: Thanks, Al for your uninformed endorsement, I’m sure the readers will appreciate it.

Bye for today, I’ll leave you with this thought from The Tarot of the Celarien:

The King of Swords might advise: "To be King, know your true adversary."

that's all--