When I Get Stubbed, I Want to be a Big Ash
People used to smoke. Lots. Many still do, I’m not ag’in it. People are vegetarians now. I’m not ag’in it.
If butts could talk, the only way we could tell them is by the brand.
American Spirit: I recognize my brand, my smoke, my savor. I bet it’s from Harry.
American Spirit: Who’s Stephen?
(Stub, Stub… Smash)
American Spirit: Oh, my crap. That hurts. I was on fire, happy, joining with Sam, and then he just slammed me here. OMG. What a headache.
(Stub, Stub, Stub… Grind, smash.)
Kool: Ohhhhhh. Wheeeuuuu. That was crazy. Missy and I were enjoying the long ride down from the great feelings that Missy was feeling with Sam, and then Missy heard something, took a last drag and bam! I’m history.
——————— some time later ————
American Spirit, Camel, Kool, Marlboro: Look another ash! Maybe news!
(Stub. Grind. Stub, stub, stub. Grind. … smash)
Like I say, I’m not ag’in smokers. Nor vegetarians. Ashtrays have more interesting conversations – prove me wrong.