Wrestling with Memes Again

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The local Aikido fountainhead at L’ecole de Budo send me an email inviting me to an intense exercise weekend of swimming upstream with salmon.  Make sure your wear your bear repellent.

I replied that he may want to get his thyroid checked. And wish him a very happy birthday celebration. And, of course, is it really salmon run season?

Tommy from Gunas Lp. is in training as a Pro Wrestler: he signed a long term contract with Gorgeous George, Inc. (A wholly fictional subsidy not associated with the real GG) to supply him with training, opponents and outrageous costumes.  In return he is to kick-back 50% of his proceeds for the next ten years.

Gina, the sales rep drove Tommy back from the paper shuffle.   Gina started singing: “Parking spot, Parking spot, there will be a Parking spot.  Round the corner there’s a parking spot” — And, sure enough, there was a parking spot on Portland’s rush hour Lombard.  Impossible — She continues: “I can go all down MLK blvd and never hit a light when I sing the right song.”

Tommy, with his usual classy style, says: “I like it when you talk like Southwick.  Wanna Fuck?”   (Author’s note: Tommy really does talk like that, I’m not going to dumb it down, sorry.)

Gina very cordially replies: “Tommy, you are a client, and I never fish off the company pier” — Tommy, only at that instant, realizes that he didn’t want this lady, she probably had some serious defect, like an intense hatred of Pro Wrestlers.  Tommy decided to pump concrete into her tires.

As Gina drove off, she mentioned ,“Hey, I know all about concrete in the tires, try it, estupido, and your career is all over.”  Tommy loves epiphanies.

He marvels about how the parking spot appeared, how she knew about the tire thing, and how she had him by the balls professionally.   But mostly he marvels about how the parking spot appeared. 

When asked, Southwick said: “I promised my professor at ol’ Newage Sewage State University to keep secret the secret from people who would tell the secret.  But even if I tell you the secret, You won’t know the secret, cause you can’t understand the secret!”

Southwick continued: “Some people believe there is magic in words.  It seems to work to organize their thinking and that makes them prone to getting things they want.  Not so mysterious when you think about it.” 

Whether by hook, or by crook, it seems to work in practice.  Make a word, make an affirmation, make a story, make it a meme and it will prevail — just listen to this: 

in the beginning was the word, and the word was good.

Visual – Slow fade from black.  Very out of focus – slow movement, maybe through a structure, but very out of focus and dark.

No words, no story.   No story, no Bible.  Story preceedes Bible, and words preceed Story, and even before that, chants without words preceeded words.

Each danger had a chant.  Each joy had it’s chant.  The first chants were one syllable, and named the most important dangers and joys of the people.

The chants became longer as they described every thing: Dangers and places, Joys and actions.  Joys are always active.  Kiss, love, breathe, swallow.  Dangers are dark places.  Far, Night, Fright, cave.  Qualities came next: good, bad, dark, stink. and God and the lesser gods too.

It was good.  It made even an ordinary one, an ancient one, be able to hold the attention of the people.  All you had to do was learn the chant.  And then there were chants, and soon there were many chants.  

Announcer is now the Old Man - and we have a close up of his face.  (Visual – this is the first recognizable thing in view.  Rembrandt lighting - could be polynesian, could be aboriginal, impossible to tell)

And each chant was the right chant.   And the older of us teach the younger of us all the chants of all the places and things that we know and you must learn.

So listen to me now, as I tell you the chant of this "Secret Grove:" Some places have chants that are secret and special to them.  And only to be revealed to that place: Because that place is also a lesser god, and that chant is for that god alone: no other god may hear it lest it start a god-war:  where mountains turn into liquid and the earth shakes.   But now that we are here in this grove, this secret grove, I may tell you the name.

But you must promise, promise never, ever to tell, lest they finish the cutting they started at your man-initiation, that you will never reveal to any but a full fledged man of our tribe these names and chants:

So pledge now, or leave this place forever. ( web style presentation: (click here to proceed) – ) Good now I can tell you (Visual: lighting comes up soft but bright – a Spring day)

The name of this Secret Grove is "FriendStadium" and if you chant this over and over, our team will win!   "Friend– EEEEYYYOOOOO –Friend– ooooowwwweeeeee!" (finishes shouting with the crowd)

Southwick says there is magic in chants and cheers.  If teams can have their own chant and cheers, why not You?

Tommy has decided against a career in Pro Wrestling.  Gina might just want to wrestle with his memes a bit – he is no longer the "company pier". 

that's all--